So many ideas...! So little motivation to even begin them, let alone complete them. I have an idea, guys! Wh- yes, again! No, I- This time for sure- Stop doubting me!
Tuesday's child is full of grace

yesings:

what if i died in like twenty years and all i left my girlfriend was a box and like she gasps and reaches down to her chest where her key necklace hangs that i gave her twenty two years ago, and she uses it to unlock the box and all that is in there is a string which you can pull to reveal an embarrassing photo of spongebob at the christmas party

(Source: miniaturepoodle)

spermbanker:

dollarwilliam:

spermbanker:

my phone just changed “what” to “me hat” and i can’t stop imagining a forlorn pirate reaching for his cap as it floats just beyond his grasp in the breeze only to clutch his breast as he sheds a year and murmurs “…me hat…”

forlorn pirates apparently go from 25 to 24 with just a touch of the breast!!!

my phone has struck again. this poor pirate has to suffer through so much. tragic.

jeankirstchein:

do i believe in love at first sight? absolutely. do you know how many anime characters ruined my life in their first 3 minutes of screentime

jaclcfrost:

what you said was very sweet and means a lot to me but i am incapable of properly responding in any way besides “thank you so much aaaah” because i do not know how to accurately express the exact level of my gratitude to where you completely understand how much what you said meant to me without me getting even more emotional and looking like a fucking nerd: an autobiography